Change & Mediocrity

Nothing in life is constant. Everything is constantly changing–every molecule of a body, every thought, every emotion, every plan. Our ever-changing lives resemble anything but a stationary lump of rock. Yet, even a lump of rock is not actually stationary.

Destiny, fate, or whatever you call the seemingly predestined plans for every life, are merely signposts that mark the beginning of a fork, an intersection with numerous different paths leading to a gazillion different outcomes. You cannot tell what makes what happen, what turns something or someone into something or someone else, what changes what. You can only make your own decisions and expect a shadow of a certain outcome which may or may not be the case in later reality. How you define yourself today may have nothing to do with the person you are five years from the present. Some traits stay, some do not. You should not delve into the past and vilify yourself for the mistakes you made a lifetime ago.

What is left, then, when you turn to ash? How many people actually leave behind a legacy and positively affect the society we are living in? What about the rest of us–the average ones struggling to make a decision in order to alter the disappointing outcome from a previous decision which stems from a false belief that resides in the mind of a completely different person that is once ourselves?

© 2017 Cassian Vu

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Dissonance

Spades over heads we march
towards our final resting grounds;
Igniting transmuted primordial
corpses along our steps,
Layering the soulless structure
of our colossal synthetic chorion—
All hail the robotic god!

Deadening noises from metal webs
soothe our hunger
for approval from faraway breeds.
How oblivious we are—
slighting fleshless brethren,
deaf and blind to fellow dwellers’ anguish,
—to Her weeps.
Sermons after sermons,
green blood spilt,
still giant iron mallets
crushing all roots of hopes.

Closing chimes
from the parched tower
behold a forsaken child,
catching his last breath,
amongst a sea of tombless graves—
“Mercy, Mother,
Mercy…”

© 2017 Cassian Vu

Love, Pt. 2

You turned away on a night grown still,
uttered gentle, piercing words
wrecking my stare.
Soundless pleas trembled my lips
—a shattered silhouette of existence
cloaked in the biting air.
My agony arose
from an unending voidness
where gone ardor had dwelt.

You painted my dreams with honeyed promises,
the fulcrum of my faith
amidst your whirlwind of passion.
Then abandoned
my shuddering hands
clutching fictitious colors long faded away.
Fluttery naivety of youth
mercilessly trampled, tainted,
never to glimmer once more.

© 2017 Cassian Vu

Today I Dreamt of Dying

Today I dreamt of dying—
From the body
my uncaged soul soaring.

Blissful revelation—heartbeats ceased,
Eyes wide open—unfettered ecstasies.
One more glance, I then let go;
Journey ended, eternity glowed.

Petty little stories oft we tell ourselves:
Of life, love, and the never-can-tells,
Of worlds that seldom appease,
And of dreams cast in a breeze.

Sinned as I had, no inferno below,
No blazing rays awaited the tunnel I shadowed.
Only a darkness—deathless and mellow,
Like a mother’s womb—tender and whole.

‘You are home,’ rustled the Crossed,
‘Now ensconce
and enlighten us with your jaunt…’

© 2017 Cassian Vu

Crystal

Lying on his bed, he wondered how he ended up this way. A mess, inside out. No lover, no job, no family or relatives close by, and almost broke.

As an existentialist would say, he was his choices. The decisions that got Casey here were the ones he made. He was confident and intransigent and even risky when he made them. But now, wasting away in a dimly lit room with no sounds from within, Casey wondered what malevolent demon had possessed him at those moments to have driven him to recklessly throw his life away like he did, in the name of “choices.”

Continue reading “Crystal”